My Nemesises

I have a holiday nemesis and its name is Valentine's Day. Cards, candy, and flowers have been strategically placed in every store I frequent for weeks now. Almost all TV shows and commercials have had some kind of stupid cupid theme, as well. Let's not forget to mention how every Facebook game I play (Cafe World, Mafia Wars, and Sorority Life) all have their own special lovey dovey crap that makes me want to gag, too. There is no escape from my enemy and I can almost hear its evil laugh at my failed attempts to do so.

I know what you are thinking...if I had a gentleman caller, then V-day and I could embrace one another and frolic and play the Eskimo way. Not so much. Well maybe.

I have a celebrity nemesis and its name is David Hasselhoff. So what if the powers that be decided to humor him with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame? Pictures of him like this with puppies make me want to gouge my eyes out. I don't care that he was once cool back in the days of Knight Rider. Too much has happened (think drunken burger eating) since then to turn his reputation around.

I know what you are thinking...wouldn't it be funny if David Hasselhoff was my gentleman caller? NO, IT WOULD NOT BE FUNNY, YOU SICKOS! ugh...