Whirlwind Recap

What would Christmas be without a decorated goose?

I know I keep disappearing.  Don't take it too personally.  It seems when I first started blogging I looked at any and all opportunities to find some great "story" to share and now it's about finding the time/energy to share whatever few great "stories" happen my way.  The longer I go without blogging, the more annoyed I get with the prospect of trying to catch up on my blog.  Does that make sense?

So, with that I do a quick recap of events.

Christmas
As some of you know, for 33 years, I have spent Christmas in Chicago.  With the upcoming arrival of the first grandchild to my parents, our family opted out this year because we couldn't stomach the idea of younger sister Linda having the baby without us being around and we also couldn't stomach the idea of spending Christmas sans Linda and Craig.

We all gathered to my parent's house on Christmas Eve and ate too much food and watched Christmas movies.  Older sister Cathy, brother-in-law Jay, and I all decided to stay at my parent's house for the long weekend.

We all gathered again at my parent's house on Christmas Day and ate too much food, watched Christmas movies, and opened up presents from my parents.  Normally we would have exchanged our sibling "Secret Santa" presents, but we decided to wait until New Year's Eve so that brother Eddie and sister-in-law April would be able to join us.



I lost our competition because my door knob was disproportionate to the door and house. But I'm not bitter...oh no. 



The whole line-up - Jay's, mine, my mom's, and Cathy's.  Cathy won.  Whatever.

Linda, Craig, and Coco just a few days before Ethan's arrival.

My cute mom and dad.

Nephew time
My nephew, Ethan Edward, was born on December 28th.  He was a whopping 10 lbs, 4 oz and measured 21" in length.  Linda and Ethan remained in the hospital until New Year's Eve day.  Linda started her own blog, so for more info go here.

Sweet Ethan on his birth day.

too cute for words

It's hard work being this adorable.

New Year's
What a great way to bring in the New Year!  We got to enjoy our little Ethan and we had Eddie, April, my aunt, my uncle, and my two double cousins - Nicole and Danielle all in from out of town to share in the excitement and anticipation of a brand new year filled with wonderful opportunities!  We also had our sibling "Secret Santa" gift exchange, ate too much, watched my dad play Bejeweled, and brought in the New Year in the Spa sipping on champagne.

Freebirding
While my two double cousins, Nicole and Danielle, were in town, I made sure they experienced a burrito the right way - a la Freebirds (vs. the wrong way - a la Chipotle's which they do have at home back in Chicago).  Danielle opted for the daintier "Hybird" while Nicole and I want all hungry-hungry hippos and ordered "Monsters".  The verdict:  those cRaZy girls prefer Chipotle.  Whatever.

Nicole with her spinach Monster

Danielle with her wheat Hybird

A toast to the New Year - Freebirds style!

Wedding
What does a year look like without a family wedding?  I don't remember.  We have had one every 1 to 1.5 years in our family for the past 5 years.  This year, we all gathered in Springfield, IL for my cousin Anna's wedding to her new bride, Nicol, on Jan. 14th.  I have two words for you:  Photo Booth!  Have you ever been to an event with one of these things?  OMG - soooo fun!  My cousin Rachel and I kept going in there - sometimes by ourselves and sometimes with a group and laughed the night away. 

Chicago
I was supposed to drive back with my family to St. Louis to grab our flight back to Houston, but work duties called me to Chicago instead, so I caught a ride with double cousin Nicole and her boyfriend Justin back to Chicago.  I spent the next 3 days in meetings designed to improve the operations of our company.  Have you ever spent 3 full days in meetings?  Wow - it was really hard for this girl with A.D.D. who is used to multi-tasking the days away.

Now what?
Those of you who "listen" to me FB or Twitter, know that I like My Fit Foods.  I'm just sooo not in a cooking mode right now.  I haven't been for quite a while, actually.  My Fit Foods has fresh prepared meals you can just pick-up, warm-up, and eat.  I've gained back a lot of the weight I had lost.  I'm not happy about this, but not being happy about it doesn't change the situation.  I've tried to restart South Beach time and time again and I keep failing.  My mom thinks this is because I enjoy life's challenges and I already conquered South Beach (um...before the weight gain) so now I need a new challenge.  Younger sister Linda and her hubby, Craig, have started Weight Watchers Online.  I've decided to follow in their footsteps - so basically I'm food tracking and I'm eating most of my meals via My Fit Foods.  I'm kinda squashing most of my racing for now because I've not been training and it's becoming a bit of a joke (that isn't funny).  I have plans to get back into the groove, one mile at a time.

So...please forgive me for getting behind in my blogging and blog reading.  I will make a concerted effort to stay on top of such things moving forward!

Cheers to a Happy and Healthy New Year!

M.I.A.

Apparently I went missing again.  Not from the real world, but I've been relatively quiet on the social media front.  I think, as a whole, I'm not very happy with this year.  That makes me sound like a spoiled brat when you read what I've been up to in my absence, but doing things and feeling things are sometimes two VERY different things.  Does that make sense?

October 18th was the last time I blogged.  6 weeks ago.  Bad Blogger.  Here are the highlights of things that happened during my disappearing act...

Painting Class
I bought a Groupon for one of those painting classes at Merlot to Masterpiece a while ago.  It took a bit of coordination to get some friends and fellow bloggers (Kim, Amanda, Marg, and Britt) together, but we finally managed to swing it.  Here is what the "goal" was supposed to look like:

Here was my finished (and framed) product:

The group shot:

Top Row - Amanda, Me, Kim
Bottom Row - Marg, Britt

Vacation
I headed to Chicago at the end of October to hang with family and participate in The Monster Dash.  My cousin Courtney and I walked 13.1 decked out in Angry Birds gear.  It was Courtney's first (and I'm told last) half and I promised her we would stay together.  I never left her side and we finished it.

While in Chicago, I made sure to eat all my favorite foods.  I hit up Portillo's twice - the first time for Italian beef and the second time for hot dogs.  We may or may not have managed to get the car towed while on our hot dog run during rush hour traffic downtown.  =/

I managed to pick-up some of my favorite candies from Fannie May - most notably Trinidads.

The beauty of a Trinidad lies in its decadent layers of rich, creamy real dark chocolate,
covered in a golden toasted coconut shell.

Of course, the best breakfast in the world can be found at Walker Bros. Pancake House.  Carbo-loading at its finest.

Post race, Courtney and I indulged on the BEST Chicago-style pizza EVER - Lou Malnati's.

Although it's hard to beat the BBQ of the South, Famous Dave's is quite delicious especially when hanging out with some wonderful cousins!

While downtown, I got to experience Chicago from the tourist perspective instead of my usual in and out of our designated commitments routine.  It was a nice change of pace.  I saw the famous Forever Marilyn statue (26 feet tall) and the Cloud Gate.

Management Meetings
Not even 2 weeks after my Chicago vacation, I set-off for Chicago again for my company's annual Management Meetings and Award Banquet.  Every year a book serves as the theme for the meetings and the upcoming year.  This year, Ubuntu! was the chosen one.  The basic concept is that "I am because we are" and that "we are all in this together".  In short...teamwork.  I have to say that some of my disgruntlement regarding work this past year has been as a result of a lack of teamwork, so this book and theme were much needed and appreciated (and will hopefully pay off).

After arriving in Chicago on Thursday, 11/10, all the managers (traveling from 12 Service Centers located nationwide) were whisked away to check into our hotel and then managed a caravan downtown to meet up with all the management of our headquarters to the Signature Lounge at the 96th Floor of the John Hancock building for a marvelous dinner (and an open bar).

Friday was filled with various meetings and followed-up with our Award Banquet.  Upper management has been really great about giving us monthly and quarterly statistics so most of us had a basic idea of our rankings in each category, but there is always one award whose recipient is always a mystery - the Service Center (SC) of the year award.  This award originated 8 years ago.  My SC won it for the first time in 2008.  We won it for the second time in 2009 becoming the 2nd SC to manage a repeat.  Then came 2010...we had dreamed of a 3-peat just to end up in 6th place (boo!).  I had a plan to win it back.  I can honestly say I worked the hardest I ever have in all my 12 1/2 years with this same company.  It paid off!  Now the only problem with being #1 is that there is a large target on your back!  =)

On Saturday we spent half a day finishing up our meetings and then it was off to my aunt and uncle's house to hang with family for the evening.  Wouldn't you know we managed to get our happy Lou Malnati's pizza for dinner!


Thanksgiving
Apparently I like to fly every 2 weeks.  =/  I only get sick EVERY time, but no big deal.  So we decided to resume our annual Thanksgiving trip to Vegas despite the fact that younger sister Linda and brother-in-law Craig were not going to be able to join us because of the upcoming arrival of their first child.  Older sister Cathy figured out that this was our 15th Thanksgiving in Vegas.  We spent 14 of them in a row, but detoured to Orlando last year for a fun-filled week in Disney and Universal Studios.

My parents stayed at the Venetian while the "kids" resided in my grandmother's condo located a couple of miles from The Strip.  This year was a bit different, though.  Normally we manage a movie or two walking from The Venetian all the way down to the Showcase movie theater by the MGM.  This year, we didn't see a single flick.  I also normally hang out at Casino Royale, but...not this time.  I mostly gambled away at The Venetian, the Palazzo, and the Las Vegas Hilton (because it was located across the street from our condo). 

We did swing a show - taking in Sting at Caesar's Palace.  It was in the Celine Dion theater, so a more intimate setting.  I loved listening to the background story of how his songs were conceived and I have mad appreciation for his violinist who made amazing music!

The ladies swung a spa day!  My mom treated older sister Cathy, sister-in-law April, and me to a spa treatment at the Canyon Ranch Spa located in The Venetian.  I chose a European facial and experienced rejuvenation in my skin!  I literally felt my skin glowing the rest of the day.  Upon completion of our respective services, we spent over 2 hours in the wonderment that is the spa-experience...the Hot Tub, Steam Room, Sauna, Herbal Laconium, the Igloo (yes, as cold as it sounds) Salt Grotto, and Wave Room while sipping on orange-infused water and delicious herbal teas.

Though I pretty much came home a big loser, I had some really nice hits throughout my gaming that kept the days fun and entertaining.  My favorite slot machines this year were Quick Hits and Hot Shots.  I will definitely be revisiting them next year!

And that's about it in a nutshell.  Hopefully I will be posting more frequently since it is now "the most wonderful time of the year!"  I leave you with this pretty dress displayed at The Venetian:

display dress made entirely of paper and ribbons

Losing someone...

Someone near and dear to me passed away today.  Had I known death was on the table, I would have done things differently.  I would have called him.  I would have visited him.  I would have made sure he knew how much I cared.

Death really puts things in perspective.  It's sad that it comes down to that, though.  It really is.

I woke up this morning and thought I better call this person.

I grew more and more frustrated as the day progressed and I kept coming up empty-eared as I tried to contact him.  At first, I called his hospital room directly just for another man to answer the phone telling me he must have been moved.  Then I called the hospital to reach him, growing more anxious as the seconds ticked by before my call was transferred.  I was then told his line was busy and asked if I wanted to speak to the nurse's station or if I wanted to call back.  I opted to call back.  This was the routine for 3 additional calls placed today.  I finally gave up at the end of my work day, vowing to reach him tomorrow.

Only problem is that there is no tomorrow.  As soon as I drove into my garage this evening, I received a phone call that he had passed away this afternoon.

Had I known?  Maybe, in the back of my mind.  Was it still shocking to me?  Yes, yes it was.

Who was this man?  He was one of my employees, a team member.  He always managed to put a smile on my face.  I knew him long before I became his "boss lady" (as he liked to call me) because my father hired him about 8 years before I joined that very same team.  He helped move me into my dorm room in college.  Then he helped move me out.  He always asked me how my monsters were doing and how my training and races were going.  He came to me when I was doing well with my weight loss so that I could help him do the same.  He called me while on the road just to check in and see how everything was going.  Many a tall tales this man spun, much to my delight.  He had a booming voice that would announce his presence long before he was seen.  He had a way with words that was both funny and endearing.  He had great respect for my family and a genuine love for our company, always taking pride in his work.

We may not like all of our employees or co-workers, in fact we probably just tolerate the vast majority of them.  That was not the case for me with this guy.  I loved him and will miss him terribly.  He may no longer be on this earth, but he will never be forgotten.  RIP Big Papa.

*sigh* ... another "Kim"

I pulled another "Kim" today.  What is a "Kim"?  Well...usually it's when I do dumb things seemingly for other people's amusement, an Aggie moment kinda thing.  In this case, my "Kim" made my dudes at work sad.  I feel a little guilty about that, I really do.

Work decided this year that they wanted all of our service centers to provide a breakfast or lunch or ice-cream kinda shindig once a month or so in appreciation of our employees.  This is relatively easy for most of our service centers as their head counts are significantly lower than mine.  So, I am faced with the challenge of coming up with a shindig that will benefit as many of my dudes as possible without being too pricey.

My father and I decided to do a lunch this go-around.  At first I thought about ordering a honey baked ham and then making baked beans, buying some potato salad, bread, and condiments.  Then I saw the cost of a 1 1/2 hams and freaked out!  For the same amount of money, I could go to Rudy's BBQ and get 15 lbs of meat, potato salad, beans, bread, pickles, onions, jalapenos, and iced tea.  Oh...and the best part - no work on my behalf.

I ordered up the goods on Monday for pick-up today.  My father and one of my dudes went to get the grub.  I decided to serve it since the dudes have little to no control when it comes to food and I needed to make sure there were enough leftovers for those out on jobs today.  They asked about the onions and jalapenos and I looked at everything we had and surmised Rudy's forgot to send it.  Silly Rudy's.  The guys were sooo disappointed.  Poor dudes!

After everyone ate, I went to put away the leftovers and couldn't believe I had a whole pan left of potato salad.  Those on jobs will be so excited.  I decided to put the little bit of remnants from the other pan of potato salad into the full one to consolidate and imagine my shock when this:

turned out to be this:

Instead of more of this:

My "Kim" was that I assumed POJ was really POT and meant "potato salad" instead of "pickles, onions, jalapenos". 

Poor dudes indeed.

The ones out on jobs will have a plethora of POJ, but hardly any POT.  =/

*sigh*  I need to keep my "Kims" in check.

what defines me

I have been working for the same company for 12+ years.  I started out as the Office Manager, then I became the Operations Manager, and finally the General Manager.  Did you know that I'm the only girl at my job?  True story.  I'm surrounded by too much testosterone on a daily basis.  The company I work for has 12 Service Centers in addition to our corporate headquarters.  Mine is the largest.

I've discussed my position before...only in that the term "General" is way too...encompassing.  It is difficult to manage everything, especially when you have as many people to manage as I do.  I still have a long way to go to be the best manager I can be, but I think I'm getting there - through trial and error and most of all...experience.

All of the general managers bring their own "thing" to the table, so to speak.  We all have different issues determinate on our location, labor pool, proximity to one another, etc.  We all have our short comings and we all have our talents.

My talent is in logistics.  It's really laughable because I have the worst sense of direction of anyone I know and I still have to look at the U.S. map to get a feel for where everything is located.  I think I am successful because I'm not afraid to be creative, to explore all my options, and to verify the efficiency of my decisions by way of using all my resources.

I have often said that it is a good thing I have A.D.D. because if I were one of those anal retentive types who are not flexible, I would be a failure at what I do.  This is to say that my ability to jump from task to task and accept constant interruption prevents me from going completely crazy while still being productive.

I can look back at this summer...actually this whole year...and say that I have worked harder than I have the other 11 years I have been employed with my company. I have worked more hours.  I have managed my resources BETTER.  I have taken on additional tasks.  The more work that has been loaded upon me, the better I have performed.  I know this.

What sucks is that I can also say that in all my 12 years, I have never ever felt this stressed, this attacked, and this resentful.

It's weird to think that on one hand I am so proud of what I have accomplished and yet on the other hand I am angry and frustrated that I have been treated poorly by many as a result of my hard work and dedication.

That doesn't make sense, right?!  Exactly.  Hence the frustration.

Ever since I had my first "real" job - working at H.E.B. as a cashier - I have demonstrated my loyalty, my work ethic, my desire to excel at what I do.  One could go so far as to say I define myself by way of my work.  At H.E.B. we were given produce tests every month.  We were also scored on how many items we could scan per minute.  I was competitive with these things because at that time, in that place, those things mattered.  I wanted to be the best...and sometimes I was.  Other times, my friend Stephanie beat me.  =/  No worries, it was a friendly competition.  We could get more money by cross-training in other departments.  I did this.  I did everything that was asked of me and more because that was what was expected of me and that was how I was raised.

I know that when you get knocked down, you are supposed to get up again.  What I don't know is why people feel it necessary to knock down the girl who is good at her job.  Since when did it become bad to be smart?  Since when did it become bad to be efficient?  Since when did it become bad to problem-solve when issues arise instead of pushing it off on someone else?  Since when did it become bad to ask questions that need to be asked AND to expect answers...or even just a response.. in a reasonable amount of time?  Since when did it become bad to work hard and expect appreciation for your efforts?

In the world I want to live in, people are rewarded for their efforts and not criticized.  In the world I want to live in, people who are good at their jobs get to keep them and people who are not either get put in a position more suitable to their skill level OR they get let go.  In the world I want to live in, problems are addressed and not ignored.  In the world I want to live in, I can go home each night with peace in my soul.

Tonight, I am not at peace.  Tonight I am hurt, I am angry, I am mad, and I am sad.  I am torn between wanting to scream and wanting to cry.  I put all my energy, time, heart, and soul into my work.  Why?

My work shouldn't define me anymore.  It should just be a job...one I can leave at the door when I go home each night.  I don't want to continue to waste so much of me on something that doesn't give back what is put into it.  It's a mental, physical, and emotional drain.  All that for no return on my investment.  If only Calgon could take it all away...even if it were just for today.

Happy July!

I hated June.  I think I hate June every year come to think of it.  Oh well...it's neither here nor there cuz a new month is upon us.

One little cool thing about June though is that mi casa turned 11.  Ye gads, can you believe it?!  11!!!  How am I old enough to have bought and lived in my very own home for 11 years???  I can tell it's 11, though.  Ruben is needing some work.  My second garbage disposal blew out and needs replacement.  The whole interior of the house could use a fresh coat of paint.  The master bathtub/shower is needing some retiling.  Pretty sure two new toilets would be lovely!  Once I open up the can of worms called home-improvement, there will be no turning back.  The cool thing is that in less than 7 years, Ruben is 100% mine...all mine thanks to some refinancing I did several years back.  Now that is a good feeling!  =)

Let's look at July...

The parentals are abandoning ship AGAIN.  My father is heading out to Scotland on a golf trip with two of his brothers and my mother is going out to Los Angeles to visit with my brother and sister-in-law and then continuing her jaunt out to Vegas for some R&R.  This means I head to their house for Oliver-sitting.  I thought to ask Linda and Craig (and Coco) to join me and my monsters for a long-weekend staycation. We plan to eat, watch movies, and soak up the sun poolside.

I also plan to get some mad mileage in.  We need not mention how The Hottest Half is *gulp* six weeks away and how this chickadee isn't nearly where she should be training-wise.  I blame work for zapping the life out of me, by the way....well and a stupid blister on the back of my heel, but whatever....

Since I'm gonna be at the parental's house for about a week, I figure it reaps a couple of advantages.  It saves on my electric bill at home (thank God) and they have a home gym.  I can cross train my heart out on the bike when I'm not walking, running, skipping, crawling out my mileage on the pavement in this AWFUL heat. 

So happy July to you all!  May you have a wonderful much needed holiday weekend filled with fun, family, and friends!

making lemonade

My cute mom has always said if you don't have something nice to say, then you shouldn't say anything at all. Well...I suppose all of our cute moms have told us that a time or two.  I've been kinda quiet lately.  It's so unlike me.  It even makes me uncomfortable when I'm on mute.

Bottom-line is I've just been...blah.

Work has been kicking my booty.  I've been putting in a lot of hours and it doesn't end when I leave the premises.  I feel as though there has been a war waged against me within the organization and there is no waving of a white flag in sight.  I have two choices here.  I can cry over the spilled milk or I can make lemonade.  Me thinks that since milk will surely spoil in this heat, the better bet is lemonade.

Shall we talk about my half marathon training?  It's non existent.  I'm so very proud of this.  not.

We could always discuss my healthy eating...oh, but let's not make a liar of me as healthy eating hasn't been happening here.

Let us not forget about my sleeping habits.  I'm lucky to get 5 hours a night and even if I do, it's interrupted.

Yep, this is why I haven't been blogging cuz I'm a Debbie Downer full of disappointments.

How do I get back on the right track?  Why oh why am I so easily derailed?  How can I be proud of me again?

Several years back I was shopping in Old Town Spring and found this little figurine in a shop.

I had to buy it because I thought it too precious and it came with such a good message - worth reading and remembering.

Today I choose to count my blessings - they are plentiful.  Today I choose to spotlight my accomplishments and not my shortcomings.  Today I choose to celebrate the fact it is a new day filled with new opportunities for change.  Today I choose to walk away from the pity party.  It's time to make lemonade, y'all (but...with Splenda perhaps)  ;)

Cheers to a HAPPY day!

good enough

First, I give you a quote.  I posted this on my dry erase board at work for my employees.


If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it.  ~Mary Engelbreit


May Ray in the City posted a blog yesterday about her insecurities.  She posed a question:  "How do you defeat negative thinking?"


This is what I commented:  "I think we are often our own worst enemies as women. It really sucks. Whenever those negative thoughts creep in (and they do way too often), I try to spin it for the positive or counter it with a positive.  I am pretty sure it's a practiced thing.  Let's practice! =)"


Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.  As I mentioned in my Zen-Kim post, I am making an extreme effort to keep my cool at work.  I've determined that cool, calm, and collected will yield better results than anxious, emotional, reactive Kim.  Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.


I am a disorganized person.  This is apparent if you come to my home and/or stop by my office.  I have been making an extreme effort to become better organized at work - maybe not in obvious appearance (like my desk still looks like a bomb hit it), but in creating spreadsheets to keep track of things and setting reminders on my Outlook.


What's my point?  I have stepped outside my comfort zone focusing on two things that don't come naturally to me.


1.  Zen-Kim
2.  Organized Kim


Why did I do this?  I wasn't happy with something (myself at work) and so I changed it (me).


I have been proud of myself.  I feel like my work performance has been stellar.  I've eagerly taken on each challenge.  Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.


Ultimately, Zen-Kim disappeared and was replaced by a crying fool.  Why a fool, you ask?  Well...because I lost sight of my own advice.  I let someone make me insecure about something I feel very secure about (my job performance).  I let other people's negativity overwhelm me.


See what I mean, lady bugs...we are our own worst enemy and our energies would be better put into warding off true enemies...you know, the external ones.  I was fighting the wrong fight.  Now, I may not be able to always change the negative self-talk that creeps up, but I can "spin it for the positive or counter it with a positive."  So with that, I decided to make a list of the things I am good at to make myself feel better after "the incident" that was this afternoon (countering the negative, if you will).


I am a speed reader.


I am a fast and accurate typist.


I have nice lips.


I am witty.


I am a talented home decorator.


I am a creative cook.


I am a super star playing Zuma Blitz.


I have some mad logistical skills.


I am good enough.  Are you?  Make your own list to remind yourself that you are, indeed!  Know it!  Live it!

Zen-Kim

Oh what a week, my lovelies...what a week!

I've mentioned my profession before - I manage a moving company.  Guess what happens in the summer?  We get busy...like ridiculously busy...like hold on to your hats, party people, cuz it's about to get cRaZy up in here busy. 

I like it.

I thrive off of it.

Everybody has those few things in this world they are good at...their talents, if you will.  I'm good at my job.  I'm even better at it under pressure.

If I have too much time to do something...it doesn't get done until the last minute.  I'm a procrastinator, but not because I'm lazy.  Nope.  It's much deeper than that.  It's because my creative and productive juices flow freely when there are no other options.

I like it when my day flies by and I have that sense of accomplishment knowing I made a difference.

Here's the thing.  I can get pretty intense.  I can let the stresses get to me, the anxiety overwhelm me.  I can take my frustrations out on others and vent until people are tired of listening to my whining/complaints.

I don't want to be like that this summer.  I want to be calm and rational.  I don't want to sweat the small stuff.  I want to have a clear head to solve problems more...altruistically.  I realize that people vibe off of me.  If I demonstrate patience and peacefulness, others will follow suit. 

My parents left town on Wednesday and jokingly told me to stare at a picture of their dog to find my Zen-state.  No, I don't think Oliver truly gave me this inspiration.  I think the very idea of it just made me laugh.  My Zen-state is coming from within...perhaps it's maturity...perhaps it's wisdom...perhaps it's me realizing that my work is exhausting enough without adding all the unnecessary emotions.

I stayed at work super late last night finishing up some work.  While doing so, I was inspired to fill up my dry erase board with some encouragement/words of wisdom, etc for my employees to see this morning when they arrived at work.

I asked a question.

At the end of the day, can you say you have tried your best?

I answered it.

Yes - Congratulations...this is what it is all about!  Keep up the great work!!!  =)

No - What improvements can you make tomorrow to turn this around?  What lessons did you learn?

This doesn't have to be applied to my employees.  This can be applied to me...to you...to us all.  Isn't the name of the game just to try our best?  Sometimes we have an off day.  It happens.  We must pick up the pieces, learn the lesson, and move on.  Other days we have experienced accomplishment, bliss, freedom, happiness, etc...  Isn't the feeling of elation we get from those good days enough to make us work harder to recover from the bad?

I should hope so.  I know so.

After a whole week of practicing "responding" versus "reacting" to all the curve balls thrown my way, I can say that I am pleased with my efforts.  I feel empowered to take on the rest of the summer with the exact same zeal.

Hopefully Zen-Kim can remain for the entirety of the summer, just taking it all in stride.

Enjoy your weekend, I know I will.

Day 20: We don't need no education.

Day 20 - How important you think education is.

Good question.

I remember having conversations with some girlfriends several years back when we were all discussing what qualities we were looking for in our future mates.  Many of my friends REQUIRED a college degree.  I did not understand this.  Perhaps they had never heard of a little thing called a trade or a skill.  If a person has a special trade or skill, then a college degree isn't always necessary.

Let's look at my employees, for example.  I manage a moving company.  My drivers make $60,000 to $80,000+ per year.  Do you think they went to college?  I may have had some that attended a couple of years.  I may even have one or two that graduated, but the vast majority did not and yet they are fully benefited men making a very healthy income.

My father never went to college.  He is one of the smartest and most successful people I know.

My brother never graduated from college (he says he retired).  He works for the same company I do, making a very similar salary.  Is he less a person for not having put in his full 4 years at an educational institution?  I should think not.  He just went down a different path.

So, I suppose it would suffice to say that I think higher education is important dependent upon what it is you are trying to accomplish.  One can surely not practice medicine or law without additional schooling and certain degrees, for example.

Other than that...to each their own.  I feel like work experience breeds true knowledge and that with knowledge comes power.  Take that as you may.

if at first I don't succeed, GET BACK ON THE WAGON!

How many times have I gotten off track on my diet plan in the past 6 months?  How many times have I had to regroup, recommit, refocus, and all that jazz?  Does it matter?  Point is, I've gotten back on the wagon.

I, like so many other peeps I know (specifically of the female gender) emotionally eat.  When I'm upset, I eat to soothe my soul.  When I'm happy, I eat in celebration.  When I'm mad, I eat to calm my inner beast.  When I'm sick or hurt, I eat to ease my pain.  There is always an excuse, it seems.

I was stressed out over the whole car purchasing thing.

Finally getting into a relationship after a year of not even dating caused me some anxiety as you can't be a 34 year old woman without some emotional baggage from past relationships that creeps in the back of your mind when getting involved in new relationships.

Work pretty much always has me in one tizzy or another.

The pain in my side held me back for almost a week.

Being sick for the past week and a half has put a dent in my training plan for my upcoming two back-to-back half marathons.  My lungs are still not where they need to be, so I haven't been able to run.  I can walk, though, so I have had to reconfigure my plan.  More on this in another post.

My point - if at first I don't succeed - I just need to GET BACK ON THE WAGON until I get it right once and for all!

I'm so sick and tired of trying again.  I know I can be successful - I've proven that.  Remember this girl:

She was me not so long ago.

I know I'm not where I want to be, though, and the only way to get there is to commit to the process - mind, body, and spirit.  I need to stay focused.  I need to remain loyal to my food plan AND combine that with an exercise (cross training) program along with my running schedule to get me to my goal.

I can do it!  I will do it!

a pain in my side

I had the worst night's sleep EVER Sunday night.  Well...I've had other sleepless/restless nights, but I guess when it's the most current one that is so fresh on the brain it seems like the "worst one EVER". 

I got home (mind you that "home" means my parent's house this week) from a date around 11pm.  I would have felt awfully guilty forcing the dogs to go to bed right away considering they were just sleeping prior to my homecoming, so I let them frolick and play for a bit before calling it a night.  We probably hit the hay just after midnight and then enter tossing and turning from stage left.  First of all, the dogs had to do their territorial bickering over who got to be the closest to me.  You would think this would give me the warm fuzzies, but really it just made me angry.  I was at the point where I would have just preferred one of them pee on me to claim me as their own so we could call it a night - honestly.  Sheesh.  Finally we were positioned just right so that THEY were comfortable.  I was not, but in all fairness it had nothing to do with them.  More on that in just a bit.  Then, Penelope woke me around 3:45am having to go to the bathroom, so all dogs went outside.  Dear sweet loveable Penelope woke me again at 4:15am to go to the bathroom AGAIN, so all dogs went outside.  Me thinks Penelope was having some issues.  I finally fell back asleep just to be awakened at 5:08am by one of my employees.  No worries - he was thoroughly yelled at.  Apparently the two of us have differing opinions about what constitutes an emergency.  I assure you...the reason behind his call was not one.  I gave up any and all hope for sleep and started my day.

For the past few days I've been harboring a secret pain.  My right side hurts -  more specifically it's my rib cage area.  It's not debilitating or anything remotely along those dramatic lines.  It mostly only hurts when I turn to the right, cough, breath out deeply, or touch it.  It still isn't normal and so I've been kind of worried.  Crazy thoughts have been filling my overactive imagination - liver issues?  gall bladder?  appendix?  lungs?  I had no idea what to make of it.  I decided to be a big girl yesterday and go to the doctor.

She wanted to rule out obvious big ticket items, so she ran a few tests and took some chest x-rays.  Everything came back as normal.  Based on me telling her of my side stitches as of late with my running - specifically with the half marathon and based on the fact that I've been really working on the use of my arm swing during my runs, my doctor has determined that it's a muscle strain with delayed muscle soreness.  I was prescribed an anti-inflammatory, a muscle relaxer, and rest.  So much for my PR hopes on Saturday...rar.

On a side note - the muscle relaxer's instructions say to take it 3x a day.  Who could possibly take a muscle relaxer while working and still manage to be fuctional?  Surely not I.  Last night it was totally like this:

Muscle Relaxer 1
Kimpossible 0

I crashed turbo fast after taking my pill.  I will say that I do feel better already, so I hope this is an indication of healing and I will be back in the swing of things in no time!

Day 02 - In 10 Years...

In case you are not in the know, I've decided to do a 30 Day Challenge, only it won't be completed in 30 days cuz I roll down a path less traveled, yo.

I am currently on Day 02 - Where you'd like to be in 10 years.

Do you think this question would be easier answered if you were already married and/or if you had all the children you planned on having?  yes? no? maybe so?

I remember back about 9 years ago or so one of my employees asked me where I saw myself in 10 years.  I told him it was impossible to answer as I had no way of knowing if I would be single or married, if I would be childless or a mother.  He said it shouldn't matter and I begged to differ.  Hindsight being 20/20, he was right.  It shouldn't have mattered.  One can come up with a 10 year dream-self regardless of one's circumstances.  I was just a kid then and didn't know better.

The only fair way to answer this is to break up the idea of 10 years into different categories.

Love Life - Please God let me be happily married in 10 years time.

source here

Children - Assuming I am married, please let me be a mother to at least one child (but preferably three)

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Home - In 7 years, my first and only house will be paid off.  I kinda hope to be in a new home in 10 years time.  It doesn't have to be new-new, just new to me (the custom built one I've been designing in my head for years would be AMAZING, though...).  Of course, if I'm not married, it wouldn't make sense and I would be perfectly content staying in my then paid-off home.

source here

Work - Let's face it, if you know me at all and my work situation, you know that I'm not going anywhere.  I would just hope to have even more responsibility and to continue to grow in my skills/confidence/leadership and to better tame the beast that sometimes rears her ugly head.

source here

Health - I will still be on the right path of living a healthy life in mind, body, and spirit.  My diet will still follow the guidelines of The South Beach diet.  I will still maintain an active lifestyle - focusing on cross training and running.  Hopefully I will have multiple marathons under my belt.  I better be maintaining my goal weight!!!!

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Friendship - I will have maintained my supremely fantastical friendships while hopefully making some new lasting ones.

source here

The outlook is good for a happy, healthy 10 years into the future, y'all.

How's yours?

a little venting is good for the soul

Some chick calls me from the hospital where I had that fateful bone scan that pronounced my pelvis to be unfit for running.  Well...correction...she apparently called my mom and dad's house and left a message.  My mother mistakenly thought she was calling for my father and gave my father the number to call the chickadee back.  After waiting for 100 years, he finally spoke to her just to find out she wasn't calling for him, but rather me.  Oh yeah...they had my parent's number on file for me.  nice.  I haven't lived with my parents since a brief 2 month stint between graduating college and getting my own apartment.  They had this particular number for me, however, as a result of my two knee surgeries that were performed on their premises some 16 and 11 years ago, respectively.

She informed me that I owe the hospital $237.38 and wants to know how I would like to pay that.  WHAT?  Wait just a minute.  Why do I owe money?  She explains that I only paid some of the cost of what I owed.  Um...I paid what you people told me I owed at the time of the procedure.  If it was more than that, you should have said so.  I don't really understand.  Furthermore, I feel like I'm under attack by some Guido.  Dude - send a bill like a normal person so I have a chance to look it over and figure out what's going on.  Don't expect me to blindly pay you to get you off my back. 

I'm still confused as to how they came up with the random dollar figure I paid at the time of the procedure - $639.08.  I know we have some weird deductible thing going on at my work, but still.  Anyway, I'm in the process of straightening the whole thing out.  Here's what I do know...if I do owe any additional money, it's no more than $110.91.  It's possible I don't owe anything at all or that I'm owed some money back, too.  Confusing?  You betcha! 

Anyway...don't treat me like I'm some slouch who doesn't pay her bills and make sure you have my information correct in the system.  How is it possible that you spent 15 minutes with me having me fill out paperwork before my procedure, that you accepted payment from me, performed a procedure on me, and  accessed my insurance information, yet you don't have my correct/current address and phone number?  I bet they did send a paper bill TO MY PARENT'S OLD ADDRESS - the house I grew up in.  lame.

Okay, done venting.

Christmas 2010

We were slightly delayed leaving Houston on Thursday to go to Chicago.  Continental played the role of little tricksters, though, letting us believe we were leaving on time and then having us sit on the plane for nearly an hour before taking off.  =/  We still managed to land on-time since they like to build in that cushion into the schedule.  I had lied to my cousin earlier and said not to worry about us being hungry.  I was glad to see my aunt didn't listen to this nonsense as she had a tray of sandwiches and some soup for us (and perhaps some Christmas cookies).

Friday, Christmas Eve, before we left to hang out with some cousins, we decided to give each our parents a little gift.  Keep in mind that they are both obsessed with Oliver, their English Bulldog.  They love him more than they love us kids.  For my mother, we had a long sleeved tshirt made up that had a picture of Oliver made up to look like an ornament and it said "Deck the Halls with Balls of Ollie".  She loved it!  For our father, we had a tie made up that had little pictures of Oliver wearing a Santa hat all over it.  My dad wore it with  pride that evening - it was so cute!  

Normally we have a big bowling game filled with trash talking, food, and laughs, but Christmas falling on the weekend made for a short trip this year (and next year, too, for that matter).  Instead, we drove out about an hour away to their house for brunch.  We stayed out there for a few hours or so and then headed back to my aunt and uncle's house to help do a bit of chopping, slicing, and dicing in preparation for the Christmas feast the next day.  We also finished wrapping presents for that evening and then got ready to go to my other aunt's house.

Christmas was a little extra special this year because my aunt, uncle, two cousins, and one cousin-in-law from Arizona came out to celebrate with us.  It has been many a year since they have joined us.

We all gathered at my aunt's house.  Food was eaten, champagne was sipped, presents were opened.  Then we went back to our house.  My mother unveiled the "surprise".  She decided to resume last year's pajama party by now making it a tradition for all the ladies to wear matching pajamas, so my mom, two sisters, aunt, two double cousins, and I all wore matching pajamas.  After we all changed into them, we gathered in the family room with a nice warm fire and began exchanging all our gifts.  The Secret Santa this year wasn't so secret.  Next year we will need to have a refresher of the rules apparently!  Brother-in-law Craig picked me and he bought me Season 3 of the HBO Series Big Love, Season 4 of the Showtime Series Dexter, a 15-lb Kettlebell, and a Kettlebell DVD.  From the parentals, I got a new area rug for my family room, a matching entranceway rug, a Texas A&M garden gnome (I named him Augustus), some bathroom accessories I picked out to redecorate my master bathroom, and then the piece de resistance....my mother knew that I wrote in my These are a Few of my Favorite Christmas Things blog about my stocking and how much I miss it being filled, so she broke into my house (with her key) while I was at work on Thursday, stole my stocking, smuggled it in her suitcase, and filled it with these goodies above!  Honestly, this is one of my favorite gifts of all time!  Oh...we also had one more gag gift for our father.  Cathy and Jay came up with the idea of using the picture of him in the golf themed Mickey Mouse ears from our Disney trip and having it made into a t-shirt.  Then, because he kept mispronouncing Komodo (of Komodo dragons fame) and it became such a joke on our trip, they spelled it out phonetically as my dad pronounces it below.  Here is a picture of him holding his gift.

After all presents were opened, we went to bed.  It had been a long day.

Christmas morning, I woke up to the wonderful smells of turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, etc....being baked above (I sleep in the basement).  I showered, dressed, and then went upstairs for some breakfast.  Everyone started arriving around 12 noon and it was a day full of food, fun, and family.  We even fit in some game time with Scrabble, Boggle, and a mega Snow Ball Fight (which I did not participate in for lack of proper gear and a stress fractured pelvis)!  After another long day, bed was quite welcomed.

Sunday, I awoke to work issues - two of my dudes backing out of their trips and the need to find replacements.  =/  We all got ready to go to Walker Bros. Pancake House for breakfast.  This is a staple for us every time we go to Chicago.  I had the apple pancake - pure gluttony on my behalf.  I wasn't able to finish it, at least!  =D  We went back to the house for a bit more of the Boggle, and then headed to the airport.  We were slightly delayed, but made up the time in the air.

And voila - another Christmas in the books - a fabulous time with family!

cHeAtEr ChEaTeR

Shhhh....don't tell.  I'm such a cheater!  I had good intentions, I really did.  On Monday, I went to the grocery store to purchase 3 dozen eggs, mayo, mustard, and dill relish all to prepare deviled eggs for my work Christmas party which is Thursday.  The plan was to come home from work tonight and to get to boiling, peeling, slicing, de-yolking, making my mixture, and then packaging it all up for construction tomorrow.  BUT then...Linda happened.  You know...the younger sister who calls me pretty much every day on her way home from work.  She made mention that she was talking to my mom (who is also making 2 or 3 dozen deviled eggs for my work Christmas party) and that she thinks we are both nuts and that we should just go buy those Eggland's Best pre-boiled and peeled from Kroger or H.E.B.  I laughed her off...I mean...that's a cRaZy idea....I already bought the 3 dozen eggs sitting in my fridge.  That's soooo lazy.  Everyone makes fun of me when I buy THOSE eggs for my own personal consumption.  Whatever would people think of me if they know my laziness knows no bounds?!

I caved.

On my way home from work, I accidentally pulled into the Kroger parking lot and somehow ended up inside the store staring at the egg case.  I decided it was soooo worth $14.34 of my own money to not have to deal with the labor intensive work (not to mention the frustration) of peeling 36 eggs.

So, my mom, dad, brother-in-law, sister, a few former employees, and 50 of my dudes will all be lunch munching on deviled eggs, Pappa's BBQ catering, frito pie (with my mom's homemade chili), cupcakes, pecan pie, coconut cream pie, cherry pie, and my mom's pumpkin pie, apple pie, lemon meringue pie, and some cookies.

Quite the spread, huh?!

So tomorrow is gonna be a bit nuts.  I have to go into work with my bags packed for our flight.  I will work quite diligently for a couple of hours, leave work to come home and gather my doggies to take to the "doggie hotel".  After I drop them off (a heart-wrenching experience), I will return to work to help with final party preparations.  We will then eat our meal, laugh, and have a great time.  I will then have to get back to that diligent working thing (boo) before we leave for the airport.  It's a bit crazy leaving our upper 70s/low 80s and arriving in the low 20s.  I'm gonna be freezing!

Weekend Recap

Friday
My dad and I flew out at 7:25am to Chicago for our annual management meetings.  We pulled the whole aisle/window seat game hoping nobody would be in the middle seat and...IT WORKED!  Yay!  Had to finish reading a book that was required reading for the meetings.  =/  When it was done, I started reading a book recommended by my friend, LaShaune, called "I Was Told There'd Be Cake" - Essays by Sloane Crosley. 

We were picked up from the airport along with my uncle Mike and then taken to our headquarters to say hello to all the peeps.  After an hour, we were taken to our hotel where we would spend the next 24 hours.

First was lunch, then meetings, followed by the award banquet.  The last 2 years, my service center walked away as The Big Winner, so it was a bit humbling to not receive the same honors this year.  =(  We did earn 3rd place in customer service and then we had some drivers earn special recognition for their efforts, but it was a bit disappointing because I know we have the skills and the talent to perform better.  I'm beginning  my plan of action to regain our elite status for next year!

Saturday
I decided to go walking with two of my favorite people out of our New Jersey operation at 5am.  Maybe not the wisest choice considering I went to bed at 1am, but hey...I only see these people once a year!  I took my Garmin with me so we would know how far we walked and we hit 3.75 miles in an hour - not too shabby considering I was all kinds of achy (maybe due to the coldish weather?)!  I then showered and met the rest of the peeps for breakfast before we started our meetings.  We had a half a day of meetings followed by lunch and then...that's it until next year!  Most everyone flew home in the afternoon, but since my family is from Chicago, my dad, brother, and I always stay the extra day at my aunt and uncle's house.  We went over there and hung out.  I got my aunt and brother hooked on Angry Birds (cuz my friend Amy got me hooked on it on Thursday).  We were sitting there playing it while my uncle and dad were watching football.  Later we went for a yummy Mexican dinner and then I went to bed because the life had been sucked out of me.

Sunday
I woke up at 5:15am to hit the gym.  14 miles was on the schedule for my running group, so that meant 14 miles on the elliptical.  I downloaded a book on my Nano this time - "Devil in the White City", to help make the time go by faster.  It was hard to get into the groove though - for one thing, this book is strictly a narrative - would have made for a better read, than a listen.  I actually switched over to music for the last 3 miles for a change of pace.  Secondly, these were different ellipticals than I am used to, so the miles were going by more slowly.  I hopped off my elliptical at mile 5 and went on a different machine - not sure what it was called, but it looked sort of like The Gazelle, but a bit more complex.  I only did it for 1/2 a mile because it was a killah and it took me 10 minutes just to do that much - yikes!  Then I went back to the elliptical for the remainder.  It took me 3 1/2 hours for the entirely of the 14 miles (ugh) and I was booking it, so that was kind of obnoxious!  My family was nice enough to wait for me to go eat.  I got back to the house, showered uber fast, and then we went to Walker Bros Pancake House - a staple in my family!  I ordered scrambled eggs, rye toast, and this month's special - pumpkin pancakes!  Yes, I sound gluttonous, but I was HUNGRY after all that work!  When we were parking the car, he pulled into a 2 hour limit spot and I asked him if that was going to be okay.  He answered with, "this ain't no Kim at the gym!"  It made me laugh!  =D  After brunch, we headed back to the house to hang out until our flight.  My dad and I did not fair as well on the ride home, so I kindly did not make some stranger sit between us and scooted over to the middle.  We landed and went to my parent's house.  My mom made us some homemade soup and sugar free / fat free apple cinnamon bread.  I then retrieved my dogs from her care and went to my own home!  Ahhhh...home sweet home UNTIL Saturday when I leave for Orlando!!!  =D