cHoCoLaTe STAT!

It's been almost 10 months since I began my journey of living a healthier life - mind, body, and spirit. Believe it or not, the diet part has been the easy part. I have been in complete control since I embarked on my South Beach journey on July 6th, 2009....that was until yesterday. Something happened...I lost it! I had a food meltdown...well...sorta. Here's how it went down...

I was tired from having a VERY restless sleep the night before courtesy of a post-op Penelope. This made me VERY edgy at work all day long. Pretty much every little thing annoyed me and so there was this intensity about me that caused extra anxiety and stress. On top of all that (and this is totally T.M.I. and for that I apologize, but it's that time of the month. So, I wanted chocolate. I wanted lots and lots of chocolate. I'm talking extreme amounts of Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory kind of chocolate. I decided that after work, since I needed groceries anyway, I would go to H.E.B. and peruse the sugar free cookie section for some chocolate decadence. What to my wandering eyes should appear, but countless choices of boxes of cookies with the serving size being ONE FREAKING COOKIE. Who just wants one little stinkin' cookie? What is that gonna do for me? I wanted to eat the whole bag. Forget the fact that the sugar alcohols would cause a whole new set of problems...I didn't even care...I wanted cHoCoLaT STAT! I couldn't go through with it, though. I then decided to head to the baking aisle.

There are these Guittard extra dark chocolate chips I adore (pictured to the right). The serving size is 30 chocolate chips and I treat myself to them every once in a while since dark chocolate is allowed on the South Beach diet on occasion. I grabbed them and hugged them to my body. I'm pretty sure I was coveting them, in fact. As I started walking up the aisle, it dawned on me that I was so out of control for chocolate that there was no way I could open up the bag and only have my usual 30. Heck, I wouldn't be able to have only 60. I just wanted to shove handfuls of the dreamy creamy happiness in my mouth and wash it down with ice cold milk. Nope...couldn't allow this, so I put the chocolate chips back (very reluctantly). I can have them another day...once I've regained control over this beast raging inside me.

Next stop was the pharmacy section where the diet bars and drinks are located. I was looking for something with whole grains (healthy carbs), lower sugar, and the ability to satiate this fierce craving. Then I saw it...a Kashi Go Lean Chocolate Turtle Roll. Was it the best choice? Well...no, I mean the best choice would have been a piece of fruit or a sugar free pudding or a low carb yogurt. Was it a good choice given the circumstances? Absolutely. I felt completely other worldly (and not in a good way) and instead of falling off the deep end, I reeled myself back in the boat with one serving of something that would not / did not / could not blow my diet.

Phew! That was a close call, y'all! =D