The other day I was having a conversation with younger sister Linda about my struggle regarding my injury and this upcoming RunGirl 13.1. I registered for this race to have yet another opportunity to prove something to myself. In the end, I will fall short. I always do. Even if my doctor allows me to power walk it, I won't be completing it in the fashion I would have liked to, you see. I won't truly have the glory I so long for. Truth be told, even in the Aramco Half I am now going to be participating in on January 30th (in lieu of the Chevron full marathon), I still won't have the glory I long for as I'm not doing the race I planned on doing and I'm not even going to be able to do this race as well as I want given that it is now 7 weeks out and I have not run in 5 weeks. I'm my own worst enemy, I know. I'm seemingly never happy with me. Someday, I will start being my own best friend. It's just not today, but alas...in typical me fashion, I digress. My point is that I'm bound and determined to complete this sucker even knowing I will be doing so with disappointment. First of all, I signed up for it. Second of all, I paid money for it. Thirdly, I want that really cute medal.
Linda did encourage me to watch The Biggest Loser: Where are They Now episode that aired Thanksgiving week. She said there was a former contestant named Holly who was disappointed with the outcome of a race and said something that reminded her of my struggles as of late, particularly my last half marathon. I watched the episode tonight and cried along with Holly. I knew her pain, her heartbreak. I then went back and watched her again and typed up what she shared.
"You can get through anything.
You're gonna fall down.
Things are not gonna go perfect.
You're gonna have a bad day.
You're gonna have a bad race.
All this bad stuff can happen,
but it's like...it's what you do with that
that determines how you live your life"
You know what I realized? I have fallen down a lot this year. You know what else I realized? I conquered a lot, too. You won't fall down, if you don't get up/out and try, BUT you can't ever succeed if you don't try either. Maybe it really is about the journey...the experiences and not necessarily the end result. It's kind of something to think about.
4 comments:
How many people have even attempted a half marathon? You really are hard on yourself. Enjoy the victories!
Oh the running injuries and how they can mess with a gal's head. I'm SO glad you'll be participating, even if it's nothing like what you'd imagined. It'll be something else, and that something can still be wonderful ;)
Maybe it IS about the journey. :) I loved Holly in that BL episode too! Love that she didn't quit because she knew she wouldn't win. We can't all be Taras all the time (sometimes it's nice though).
Rock that half and wear your medal proudly!
I'm going to get this wrong because I'm not 100% sure where it came from. I read recently that sometimes God sends us a flood, not to drown us, but to teach us to swim.
That really spoke to me.
Walking a half marathon is NOT falling short. Sugar, most people couldn't fathom walking HALF that distance. You have accomplished amazing things. You need to be sweeter to Kim because I know for a fact she will kick your booty for talking about her like that! :o) She's a tough girl and capable of SO much!
Post a Comment