I'm trying to understand guys, I really am. Try as I might...I just don't get them.
I have head shots on eHarmony, but to be fair to the dudes who are granted the pleasure of receiving me as a match, I have a couple of body shots on there, as well. I'm not the svelte vixen I'd like to be, but I'm no longer the chunkiest monkey on the block, either.
I figure if a guy initiates contact with me, he must like what he sees.
At least 50% of the guys who have initiated contact with me shock me when they send me their Must Haves / Can't Stands list. You see, one of their Can't Stands is labeled as "Excessive Overweight" with the description being "I can't stand someone who is overweight." WHAT?!
I find that statement to be offensive ON SEVERAL DIFFERENT LEVELS. First of all, you don't have to be attracted to an overweight person, but to go so far as to say you "can't stand" them is prejudicial. It would go without saying that if you were not attracted to an overweight person, then you would not choose them, so why do you feel it necessary to then carry it to the extreme to say you "can't stand" an entire group of people? Secondly, it would make me wonder what would happen if I were to gain a few pounds throughout the course of our courtship. Would you abandon ship? What if it took a bit longer than anticipated to lose baby weight after giving birth? I mean seriously...it would be enough to make a person paranoid! Third of all, would you gawk in disgust at relatives or friends of mine that may be considered overweight? I mean where do you draw the line? I just feel that at some point a person should be mature and respectful...and at the very least think before they speak, type, write, etc...
You don't like what I'm offering, then don't choose me. If you do choose me, appreciate me for who I am across the board. Bottom line - it's time to grow up!
Oh and yeah...he got deleted as did all the dudes before him who chose that as one of their "can't stands". I don't need to deal with that kind of crap.
4 comments:
It's time for you to start doing the choosing.
Ah yes, Men.
Aren't they a peach? They never fail to make me go "WTF!?!?!?"
I agree with what you're saying 100% and I also agree with LaShaune... it's time for YOU to start doing the choosing. Pick some of those men out there! Plenty of 3 dimensional guys out there in that proverbial pond!
As Stephanie Tanner used to say, "How rooooooode!"
Seriously though, is that REALLY how you want to present yourself? As a very small, petty person? But you know what? Good thing they DID put that out there because, clearly they are too dumb to know you just can't say things like that or make blanket judgements about people you don't even know. At least you know right away that they are not worth wasting your time. But still. Sheesh.
You are worth SO MUCH MORE than cotten headed ninny muggins like that. You ARE! God is preparing you, just as He is preparing your mate. Ugh, waiting on His timing is so difficult! But we know that He knows best, doesn't He???
Someday I'll learn.
In the mean time, I'm praying for your partner AND your pelvis. ;o)
LOVE it, I feel the same exact way. One of the struggles I had dating when I had lost a lot of weight was the question "would they still like me if they knew what I used to look like".
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