good enough

First, I give you a quote.  I posted this on my dry erase board at work for my employees.


If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it.  ~Mary Engelbreit


May Ray in the City posted a blog yesterday about her insecurities.  She posed a question:  "How do you defeat negative thinking?"


This is what I commented:  "I think we are often our own worst enemies as women. It really sucks. Whenever those negative thoughts creep in (and they do way too often), I try to spin it for the positive or counter it with a positive.  I am pretty sure it's a practiced thing.  Let's practice! =)"


Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.  As I mentioned in my Zen-Kim post, I am making an extreme effort to keep my cool at work.  I've determined that cool, calm, and collected will yield better results than anxious, emotional, reactive Kim.  Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.


I am a disorganized person.  This is apparent if you come to my home and/or stop by my office.  I have been making an extreme effort to become better organized at work - maybe not in obvious appearance (like my desk still looks like a bomb hit it), but in creating spreadsheets to keep track of things and setting reminders on my Outlook.


What's my point?  I have stepped outside my comfort zone focusing on two things that don't come naturally to me.


1.  Zen-Kim
2.  Organized Kim


Why did I do this?  I wasn't happy with something (myself at work) and so I changed it (me).


I have been proud of myself.  I feel like my work performance has been stellar.  I've eagerly taken on each challenge.  Then today happened...more specifically this afternoon.


Ultimately, Zen-Kim disappeared and was replaced by a crying fool.  Why a fool, you ask?  Well...because I lost sight of my own advice.  I let someone make me insecure about something I feel very secure about (my job performance).  I let other people's negativity overwhelm me.


See what I mean, lady bugs...we are our own worst enemy and our energies would be better put into warding off true enemies...you know, the external ones.  I was fighting the wrong fight.  Now, I may not be able to always change the negative self-talk that creeps up, but I can "spin it for the positive or counter it with a positive."  So with that, I decided to make a list of the things I am good at to make myself feel better after "the incident" that was this afternoon (countering the negative, if you will).


I am a speed reader.


I am a fast and accurate typist.


I have nice lips.


I am witty.


I am a talented home decorator.


I am a creative cook.


I am a super star playing Zuma Blitz.


I have some mad logistical skills.


I am good enough.  Are you?  Make your own list to remind yourself that you are, indeed!  Know it!  Live it!